The Woman In The Photo

I came across this photo recently while sorting through boxes that came from my dad’s house.

I had never seen it before.

I didn’t know it existed.

And when I saw it, I stopped and stared.

I believe it was taken in early 2009.

A much younger, married version of me,

surrounded by our three babies,

sitting inside the office I shared with my dad at Tatsuda’s.

Jack must have been under one.

Emily was maybe two and a half.

Desiree was probably close to four.

Wow.

Talk about a throwback in time.

Looking at the desk behind us, it’s almost empty.

I must have just come back into the business part-time.

I was raising three babies and had just taken on the responsibility of carrying on a family legacy.

I was working a handful of hours a week in between naps, snack times, playdates, and trips to the playground.

Thirty-one year old me had no idea what a wild life journey this would turn into.

I don’t give myself enough credit for what I did.

I raised three beautiful children who know they are loved,

who are healthy, grounded, well-adjusted humans.

I did that mostly alone.

Their dad is a good man, and he has his limitations.

My kids know they are loved by him, and that is what matters.

While I was raising my kids, I was also learning our business—and transforming it.

Bit by bit. Step by step. Day after day.

Even when no one wanted me there.

Even when I was pretty sure most people wanted to punch me in the face.

And somewhere in between raising children and running a business,

I raised myself.

I don’t quite recognize the woman in this photo—

but I know she is me.

I miss my kids being that age.

I miss my three little ducklings who followed me everywhere.

I am so proud of them.

And I am so proud of me.